ATTAP - Humor Pages

                Error Messages That Microsoft Forgot to Document

(With thanks to Jim Craven, Jack Smith, and Becky Lloyd)

  * WinErr: 001 Windows loaded - System in danger

  * WinErr: 002 No Error - Yet

  * WinErr: 003 Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file

  * WinErr: 004 Erroneous error - Nothing is wrong

  * WinErr: 005 Multitasking attempted - System confused

  * WinErr: 006 Malicious error - Desqview found on drive

  * WinErr: 007 System price error - Inadeqaute money spent on hardware

  * WinErr: 008 Broken window - Watch out for glass fragments

  * WinErr: 009 Horrible bug encountered - God knows what has happened

  * WinErr: 00A Promotional literature overflow - Mailbox full

  * WinErr: 00B Inadeqaute disk space - Free up at least 150 MB

  * WinErr: 00C Memory hog error - More RAM needed.  More!  More!  More!

  * WinErr: 00D Window closed - Do not look outside

  * WinErr: 00E Window open - Do not look inside

  * WinErr: 00F Unexplained error - Please tell us how this happened

  * WinErr: 010 Reserved for future mistakes by our developers

  * WinErr: 011 Window open - Do not look outside

  * WinErr: 012 Window closed - Do not look inside

  * WinErr: 013 Unexpected error - Huh?

  * WinErr: 014 Keyboard locked - Try anything you can think of.

  * WinErr: 018 Unrecoverable error - System has been destroyed.  Buy a new
    one.  Old windows licence is not valid anymore.

  * WinErr: 019 User error - Not our fault.  Is Not!  Is Not!  Says you!

  * WinErr: 01A Operating system overwritten - Please reinstall all your
    software.  We are terribly sorry.

  * WinErr: 01B Illegal error - You are not allowed to get this error.  Next
    time you will get a penalty for that.

  * WinErr: 01C Uncertainty error - Uncertainty may be inadequate.

  * WinErr: 01D System crash - We are unable to figure out our own code.

  * WinErr: 01E Timing error - Please wait.  And wait.  And wait.  And wait.

  * WinErr: 01F Reserved for past unfound-as-yet mistakes by our developers.

  * WinErr: 020 Error recording error codes - Remaining errors will be lost.

  * WinErr: 021 This will end your Windows session.  Record High Score?

  * WinErr: 29a BlackMail Error  - Transmit $200 to Bill Gates immediately or
    your computer gets screwed.

  * Winerr: 29b BlackMail Error  - Transmit $200 to Bill Gates immediately or
    I'll show your wife the JPG's you just downloaded.

  * WinErr: 39c Disk Error in Drive A: - Although your disk is in perfect
    condition (I just formatted it), I don't like it any more.  Take it out and
    through it away.  Put in another one.  Now.

  * WinErr: 042 Virus error - A virus has been activated in a dos-box.  The
    virus, however, requires Windows.  All tasks will automatically be closed
    and Windows will be reloaded so the virus can be activated again.

  * WinErr: 72a Crucial Halt - Hang on, WHAT was that?

  * WinErr: 72b Memory Error - What? Tell me again.

  * WinErr: 074 System Reconciliation - Say three "Hail Marys" and an "Our
    Father" to continue.

  * WinErr: 075 Upgrade Error - You have not upgraded Windows for over six
    months.  This is not acceptable.

  * WinErr: 079 Mouse not found - A mouse driver has not been installed.
    Please double-click the left mouse button to continue.

  * WinErr: 103 Error buffer overflow - Too many errors encountered.  Next
    error will not be displayed or recorded.

  * WinErr: 394 Memory Error - you have been attempting to run this on a
    Pentium 120 with 64MB of RAM.  This is not good enough.  Upgrade now.

  * WinErr: 450 Separation of Church and Solid-State Error - Praying not
    permitted while loading windows.

  * WinErr: 543 General Protection Fault - Windows GPF initiated to increase
    Microsoft support line income.  Please call support.

  * WinErr: 625 Working Error - The system has been working perfectly for the
    past ten minutes.

  * WinErr: 666 Satanistic Error - The devil made me erase your hard drive.

  * WinErr: 678 This will end your Windows session.  Do you want to play
    another game?

  * WinErr: 683 Time out error - Operator fell asleep while waiting for the
    system to complete boot procedure.

  * WinErr: 731 Performance Error - I am not pleased with your typing speed.
    Your file is being erased.  Try again.

  * WinErr: 815 Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available

  * WinErr: 872 Can't Be bothered - Do I have to?

  * WinErr: 902 Screen Error - The system is working perfectly, I'm not lying,
    your monitor is wrong.

  * WinErr: 950 Missing Virus - I haven't had a virus in weeks.  Please
    download one.

  * WinErr: 975 Notification Error - Please disregard the next error.  I'm just
    bored.

  * WinErr: 976 Notification Error - Please disregard the previous error.  I
    Lied.

  * WinErr: 977 Notification Error - Please disregard this error.  No real
    reason provided.

  * WinErr: 983 Hard Disk Error - The files on the hard disk were neatly
    arranged and fully optimized, so I had to mess them up and put a couple of
    hundred .TMP files all over the place.

                       This page has been accessed times.

              e-mail WebMaster with any comments, suggestions, etc.

Created May 1, 1996
Last updated November 5, 1996
            Copyright (c) 1996, ATTAP, All Rights Reserved Worldwide